I joined this community because I think it would be wonderful to hear about the experiences of others, and I'm also curious as all get-out. There's so much that I'd like to explore, but quite frankly, I'm not sure I have the mindset for it. You see, I've always viewed things like cannabis, pysilocibin, peyote and other substances as medicines and tools.
This was reinforced even more after I read the Carlos Castaneda series of books. The thought of meeting Peyote during an experience actually frightens me, somewhat. How would I see myself? How would I be judged by Mescalito? Would they be a kind and gentle, or a harsh and brutal teacher? Would they guide me or break me?
I don't even wanna think about what would happen if I were to meet Little Smoke (psyilocibin mixture). It almost killed Carlos more than once, and Datura tried to mess him up too.
The thing of it is, in the later books, Don Juan explains to Carlos that those drugs were necessary to destroy certain parts of his "white man brain". Those parts of his mind were holding him back from advancing further down the Path of Power, so Don Juan destroyed them. I suppose that sounds kinda harsh, but then, Don Juan was probably the medical equivalent of a surgeon, a psychologist, a psychiatrist and a pharmacologist, all in one. And that's not including his knowledge of the world around us, not just the worlds within the body and mind, so he definitely knew what he was doing.
In short, Carlos never visited the Allies unsupervised. Don Juan was always somewhere close at hand, especially when dealing with Little Smoke.
I don't feel like I can handle such a powerful experience without special attention and supervision. It'd not only feel wrong, but I'd be scared. And fear would taint any lessons I might be taught along the way, and that's not good. And even if I *did* have special attention and supervision, I'd want to do it for...well...I guess you could say, the "Right" reasons?
I'd want to know about myself. I'd want to see myself from a different perspective, and to learn what's holding me back or pushing me forward.
I'd want to learn.